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12-01-2016, 11:57am
One day, Mike and a mate went out for a round of golf. They were about to tee off when another man comes over and asks, "May I join you? My partner couldn't make it today".
Mike agreed and as they got the second hole he turned to the newcomer and asked, "So, what do you do for a living?".
The stranger said,"I'm a hitman".
Mike
laughed and said, "You're joking, right?"
The stranger reaches into his golf bag, removes a sniper rifle and shows them. Mike took hold of the sniper rifle and peered down the telescopic sight, fairly impressed.
As Mike was looking down the scope he said, "I bet I can see my house from here......yep, that's it right there......wait......what the hell? What's my wife doing naked with my neighbours husband??".
Absolutely furious he turns to the hitman and asks,"How much do you charge?"
The hitman replied, "A 1000 bucks per shot,"
Still seething Mike says, "I'd like you to make two shots. My wife is pretty mouthy so shoot her in the mouth, and just to teach my neighbour a lesson.....shoot his dick off".
Happy to take on such an easy job the hitman gets into position and aims the rifle at Michael's house. He pauses for a minute, but continues looking through the scope.
By this stage Mike starts to get impatient and yells, "What's taking so long?? Just take the shots already!!!"
The hitman glances over to Mike and replies," Be patient mate, I'm trying to save you 1000 bucks here"
Mike agreed and as they got the second hole he turned to the newcomer and asked, "So, what do you do for a living?".
The stranger said,"I'm a hitman".
Mike
laughed and said, "You're joking, right?"
The stranger reaches into his golf bag, removes a sniper rifle and shows them. Mike took hold of the sniper rifle and peered down the telescopic sight, fairly impressed.
As Mike was looking down the scope he said, "I bet I can see my house from here......yep, that's it right there......wait......what the hell? What's my wife doing naked with my neighbours husband??".
Absolutely furious he turns to the hitman and asks,"How much do you charge?"
The hitman replied, "A 1000 bucks per shot,"
Still seething Mike says, "I'd like you to make two shots. My wife is pretty mouthy so shoot her in the mouth, and just to teach my neighbour a lesson.....shoot his dick off".
Happy to take on such an easy job the hitman gets into position and aims the rifle at Michael's house. He pauses for a minute, but continues looking through the scope.
By this stage Mike starts to get impatient and yells, "What's taking so long?? Just take the shots already!!!"
The hitman glances over to Mike and replies," Be patient mate, I'm trying to save you 1000 bucks here"