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THE VOODOO PENIS
> >
> > A Florida businessman was getting ready to go on a long business trip, so
> > he
> > thought he'd buy his wife something to keep her occupied. He went to a
> > sex
> > shop and explained his situation. The man there said, "Well, I don't know
> > that I have anything that will keep her occupied for so many weeks,
> > except...the Voodoo Penis!"
> >
> > The husband said "The what"?
> >
> > The man repeated "The Voodoo Penis" and pulled out what seemed to be an
> > ordinary dildo.
> >
> > The husband laughed, and said, "It looks like a dildo!"
> >
> > The man then pointed to the door and said, "Voodoo Penis, door!"
> >
> > The penis rose out of its box, darted over to the door and started
> > pounding
> > the keyhole. The whole door shook wildly with vibrations, so much tha t a
> > crack began to form down the mi ddle. Then the man said "Voodoo Penis,
> > return to box!" and the penis stopped and
> > returned to the box.
> >
> > The husband bought it. He took it home to his wife, And after the husband
> > had been gone a few days, the wife remembered the Voodoo Penis.
> >
> > She undressed, opened the box and said "Voodoo Penis, my crotch." The
> > penis
> > shot to her crotch. It was absolutely incredible. After three mind
> > shattering orgasms, she became very exhausted and decided she'd had
> > enough.
> > She tried to pull it out, but it was stuck. Her husband had neglected to
> > tell her how to turn it off. So she put her clothes on, got in her car
> > and
> > started for the hospital.
> >
> > On the way, another incredibly intense orgasm made her swerve all over the
> > road. A police officer saw this and immediately pulled her over. He
> > asked
> > for her license, and then asked how much she'd had to drink.
> >
> > Gasping and twitching, the woman said "I haven't had anythin g to drink
> > officer. You see, I've got this Voodoo Penis thing stuck in my crotch and
> > it won't stop screwing me..."
> >
> > The officer looked at her for a second, shook his head and replied,
> > "Yeah right...Voodoo Penis, my ass...!"
> >
> > The rest, as they say, is history....