The useless bits of info to see if we can make a million posts thread
A cynic is someone who knows the price of everything and the value of nothing.
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A daddy was listening to his child say his prayer "Dear Harold," ........ At this, dad interrupted and said, "Wait a minute, "How come you called God, Harold? The little boy looked up and said, "That's what they call Him in church. You know the prayer we say, "Our Father, who art in Heaven, Harold be Thy name."
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Adam and Eve had an ideal marriage. He didn't have to hear about all the men she could have married, and she didn't have to hear about the way his mother cooked. (Kimberley Broyles)
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A dancer goes quick on her beautiful legs; a duck goes quack on her beautiful eggs.
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A diet is a selection of food that makes other people lose weight.
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A diplomatic husband said to his wife, "How do you expect me to remember your birthday when you never look any older?"
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A diplomat is a man who always remembers a woman's birthday but never remembers her age.
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A disbelief in God does not result in a belief in nothing; disbelief in God usually results in a belief in anything.
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A dog inside a kennel barks at his fleas. A dog hunting does not notice them.
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A dog thinks: Hey, these people I live with feed me, love me, provide me with a nice warm, dry house, pet me, and take good care of me... They must be Gods!

A cat thinks: Hey, these people I live with feed me, love me, provide me with a nice warm, dry house, pet me, and take good care of me... I must be a God!
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A dog who attends a flea circus most likely will steal the whole show. :ghastly:
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Adolescence and snow are the only problems that disappear if you ignore them long enough.
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A dream is just a dream. A goal is a dream with a plan and a deadline. (Harvey Mackay)
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A drop of ink may make a million think.
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A drunk mans' words are a sober mans' thoughts.
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